About 11 years ago an ultrasound revealed the little wiggly movements within my belly to be that of a boy. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I was crushed. I chalk it up to the crash of a big glob of hormones and a, uh, interesting preconceived idea. Thirteen years before this pregnancy I had a little girl. She (who you now know is Amber) turned out to be the best little girl ever.
I knew what to do with girls. So I decided I wanted all girls. No boys. What in the world would I do with boys? Quite a few tears later and a comforting conversation with my dear sister/friend – after an extremely disappointing and unsupportive conversation with my then husband – I got myself together and settled in for the ride.
My son was feisty from the beginning. As a little fetus he kicked, spun, swam and caused a fuss. At four months pregnant he had me going back and forth to the hospital to have my labor stopped. When we weren’t in the hospital he kicked me in the same.exact.spot continuously. Sometimes multiple blows within five minutes. So hard and exact that I worried he was stuck in one spot and was going to permanently injure me.
I knew – just knew! – that my little boy was gonna be very demanding. He was tired of being trapped inside of me and was demanding to get out. With about six weeks to go before my due date I gave in. In the middle of the night while the rest of my family was asleep I endured the contractions that would not stop and kept me awake. When everyone rose in the morning thinking they were going to go about their day. I told them it was time to go to the hospital.
Little Andre was a very high-need baby from the beginning. Where most babies are soothed to sleep by a moving car, he screamed during 98 percent of the trips. Even the 45 minute ones to and from the church we were attending at the time. If he wanted something he would scream immediately. No fussing as a warning.
Fast forward 10 years. My son, who I now say is the man in my life, is learning to be respectful, patient, obedient and calm. When he does blow his steam it’s usually very dramatic, but those instances are fewer and fewer apart.
Loving his mommy…
Being a good big (15 months older) brother…
Just knows he’s cool…
His cute mini professor look…
Now I can’t believe he’s going to be 10 tomorrow. In about six hours that persistent infant will be a preteen. I’m amazed by him. Just recently it has been coming to mind that I really have a son. I’m raising a boy to be a man. A decade later and I’m so extremely proud and happy to be called Mommy by him.
Mommy made it.
What an honor I have been given.