Life... Health... Reviews...

Friday, January 9, 2009

Friendship vs. Oneship

In this Woman's World

I don't know if you've had the "friendship conversation" with anyone who you consider to be a real friend. You talk to them because you know they'll understand and offer their point of view. You share with them about how you don't understand the way some people are and how they don't give to the friendship.

You give an example of a situation with another person so they can get an idea of what you're talking about. (Because if you talked to the person you have a oneship with most likely they won't get your point.) And, if you're like me, then you say, "Well, that's not what I consider a friendship."

Today, something dawned on me. Friendship is when both people get what they want from the relationship. Oneship is a one-sided relationship where one person dictates what they want from the relationship without giving anything back or contributing anything that the other person wants, and - this is the worse part - they don't even care what the other person wants.

A oneship isn't a friendship because none of the other person's needs are met.

You may be wondering why I don't just call that an acquaintance. I don't call it that because when you have an acquaintance it's someone who you basically treat like they treat you, and you don't want anymore from the relationship. You may call to say hello, see each other out and about, but don't put any extra care and concern into the relationship. That type of relationship takes little energy and you may not even think about the person unless you see them.

Well, what do you do when you want something more from the person who you're in a oneship with? For instance, you have a girlfriend who you're always inviting places, but she doesn't recipocate. Or you're a single mother of three who continues to check up on and offer assitance to another single mother, but she never returns the favor. I could give more examples, but you get the point.

I was in a similar situation and I tried to explain to the person that I wanted more from the relationship, but they gave all of their reasons why they liked it the way it was. So I made a choice to stop "putting myself out there." I mean if I'm dissatisfied why should I be the one to sacrifice? A relationship - almost any relationship - is a give and take/a compromise.

They insisted that we are friends, but I disagree. I think that if you truly care about someone and you consider them a friend then their needs in the relationship are important. What do you think?

If you'd like to read more of my In this Woman's World posts then please click the link.

Thursday, January 8, 2009


I thought it would be better to do a post of my blogroll instead of a long list in my sidebar, but if you'll notice you can still click through to this post from my sidebar. As it moves down you'll still be able to access it.

Happy surfing...

Living Life to the Fullest
Urban Paper Loft

If there's an outdated link on the list or an update that needs to be done, please feel free to let me know. Thanks!

POed about pee pee

Photo by Jim Franco

I don't know if PO is the right phrase or not. I guess I should say that I am at my wit's end with my middle daughter.

Amareah has been potty trained since she was about 2 years old. She regressed at about 3 years old and hasn't really had any ongoing or major accidents after we got past that phase... until more than three weeks ago. It started with a couple of times of a little dampness in her panties then she had an accident overnight.

Then she started having accidents at night at her dad's place and now it's frequently at night and during the day. She's even started wetting herself at school/Headstart where she's never (since she started in September) had an accident until this past Monday.

I've tried different techniques of discipline and nothing has seemed to make a difference. I've tried sitting down and talking to her when it hasn't happened, I've tried giving her more positive attention (I'm still doing this), I try asking her questions and I've taken her to the doctor.

After I took her to the doctor about three weeks ago for holding her urine and her complaining about it, the doctor said that she had yeast build up. When she showed me I said, "Hmmm? She's always been like that ever since she was an infant. I thought it was just normal for her."

I thought it especially weird because she's never missed a well-baby visit or any checkups and, if you have girls you know this, they normally check their "girl" area to ensure that they're developing correctly when they're very small. I thought the pediatrician would have noticed something amiss and assumed since every female is different tat this was normal. Well, I was wrong. The doctor gave me some cream to use on her and Amareah said she felt much better so I thought that was the end of the problem. I was wrong - again. The situation has gotten worse.

I'm sure everyone has theories as to why children digress when already trained. I remember when my oldest daughter was a toddler her dad would call, say he'd call her in a couple of days and then not call for more than a month. For a toddler that was an eternity. When he did finally call again she would digress, then get better and the cycle would start all over again. I ended up having to tell him not to call unless he called consistently and that fixed the problem. (He's a much better dad now... and that's all I'm going to say about that! :])

Nothing I've done with Amareah has worked. Maybe you have some suggestions because I don't have any other tricks up my sleeve right now.

Cute baby clothing

Besides the miracle of birth itself, one of the best things about having a brand new baby is all of the adorable, tiny Baby Clothing. Even though I do not have infants any longer I still glance at the tiny socks, shoes, accessories and clothing that are being sold for babies.

And, I must admit, Baby Girl Clothes are my absolute favorite clothes to buy as compared to Baby Boy Clothes, which I know are adorable too. But baby girl clothes - and all the accessories - are colorful and plentiful making it seem so easy to shop for a little girl.

One of my favorite things that I have recently found is the Baby Lulu Polka dots and Mums baby doll pants set. It is a colorful little pants set adorned with flowers and with slightly flared legs that will look absolutely fabulous on any little girl. I like it because it is unique and sort of has the style that I like my daughters to wear.

Whether you are having a girl or a boy you can find a wide variety of baby clothes and must-have products that will suit your needs, your style and your baby. So have fun shopping.

Toddlers, teens & everyone in between

Do you have multigenerational children? It's when you have children in all or a lot of different generations. For instance, do you have a toddler and a teenager or an infant and a middle schooler? What about some of each? If you do then you know the challenges for parents of multigenerational children.

That's why I started the blog Toddlers2Teens. It's where we can talk about the special circumstances, funny occurrences, tips for coping and the everyday hassles and blessings of living the multigenerational life.

The blog is still a work in progress, but I hope you will visit me anyway. Even if you don't live the multigenerational life; you can still stop by, leave me a comment or suggestion and show so bloggy love.

I'll still be updating this blog regularly because this is my baby and I don't want to leave all of my blogging buddies, but I really hope to see you there as well.

Have a terrific Thursday.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009



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What about you?

Sandra, who's such a sweetie, tagged me this "Have you ever?" meme. So, here I go... you'll learn a little more about me today.

1. Have you ever been on TV? Yes, when I was in elementary school there was a news team at my school and they caught me in the line of children walking by. I didn't see it, but some of my friends said they saw me on the evening news. And, in 1986 when I was a "flag" in the band we were doing the half-time show during a home game and the camera was right in front of me. My uncle was the only one in the world that I knew who saw me. He called and said, "Hey! I saw you on TV!"
2. Have you ever sung in public? When I was in the military I sang lead in a group of three for a talent show. We weren't that good! LOL. Unfortunately, my teenager's father has that on video tape so I can't deny it. And, to make matters worse he showed her!
3. Have you ever dyed your hair blond? No
4. Have you ever eaten frogs' legs? No
5. Have you ever received a present that you really hated? Hate is such a strong word, but I'm not going to say because it's the thought that counts.
6. Have you ever walked into a lamp post?
LOL, not that I can recall.
7. Have you ever cooked a meal by yourself for more than 15 people?
8. Have you ever fallen or stumbled in front of others?
Of course, but I am sure I looked cute doing it! LOL.
9. Have you ever done volunteer work? Yes.

I got a kick out of this, but I'm not going to tag anyone directly. If you'd like to participate, please do then leave me a comment and let me know so I can read your answers.

Listening to Digital Radio

Technology just keeps moving forward and one of the things you need to be "in the know" about is the exciting new technology of Digital Radio. If you like being one of the first to try something or are interested in the latest in technology then you may be interested in the Polk Audio I-sonic ES2, which has new HD Radio tuner technology plus an alarm clock and an IPod port. Don't take my word for it, visit to decide what digital radio is for you and whether you should upgrade your car, home or even your boat to Digital Radio. There are a lot of choices in table top radios, stereo component systems, home theater and in-dash automotive and marine radios.

Once you decide that you want to upgrade you can find an HD Digital radio station that broadcasts the type of music you like. For instance, you can visit and search for new country music stations. You can even find one in your area. So, if you live in Florida you would search for Florida radio stations.

HD Radio is crystal clear and allows access to more new stations with no monthly cost. What I like the most about digital radio is the fact that it works the same as conventional radio with the exception of the signals that are sent eliminate distortions like static, hissing, popping and fading. To listen to it you just need a HD Radio receiver.

Check it out today.

Where's my mind?

My health and weight loss journal

To say that my memory is good probably wouldn't be the truth. In fact, I've been trying to figure out how long a new mom can claim momnesia. Let's see, my youngest child won't be 2 until the end of May and "experts" say that a mother's hormones really don't start getting back in order until after the first year... If you add on the medications that I'm taking and my lack of sleep, I think another two years of momnesia is in order.

{Chuckle.} What do you think?

Seriously though: For the past eight to 10 months I've weighed myself on a regular basis. At first I was weighing myself everyday and then about six months ago I switched to weekly weigh ins on Tuesdays (which is when I'm supposed to post my health and weight loss journal), but for the past three weeks I've forgotten.

I've been maintaining my weight so it isn't an unconscious avoidance. I've worked out everyday of the New Year except yesterday (it's tough finding time now that everyone is back on their regular schedules after the holidays); so I'm not quite sure where my mind has been.

My goal this year is to workout more whether it's riding my exercise bike (I did that today!), enjoying my daughter's dance pad, sweating to aerobics or toning with yoga; I am determined to get tone, fit and healthy. I decided on this goal because last year I lost 34 pounds and I am now at a stand still; a plateau. *I haven't lost any weight in about a month (and the last weight loss was due to the stomach flu!) and simply counting calories isn't working.

I'm hoping that I don't begin gaining weight like I did the last time I started working out regularly, but this time instead of giving up right away I'll keep at it to see how my weight is and my body looks after about 30 days.

*I know you may be thinking: So, the Sensa that she's using isn't working? Well, I can't blame the Sensa for my lack of weight loss or make an accurate assessment as to its effectiveness. Why? Because (and this goes back to my sudden, worsening momnesia) I rarely remember to use it.

I don't like admitting that, but what's a girl to do short of taping the little container to my forehead so the presence of it reminds me to use it. (Hey, you may want to check out Tammy at Mom Knows Everything, she's using Sensa too and I heard that she's losing weight!)

To purchase your own supply of Sensa, go to TrySensa and use the code ROCKETXL to get a 15 percent discount plus free ground shipping. If you haven't already ordered yours then you should so you can enter the Sensa contest (details below).

Are you a Sensa doubter? Check out the testimonials of those that say Sensa worked for them.

Enter the contest:

Bloggers who are reviewing Sensa have an opportunity to win and so do their readers. To be considered you will need to post before and after photos on your site or I can post them here if you ask me nicely! Your post must be during the week of February 2-6 and you'll have to email the direct link to Amanda @ rocketxl .com (no spaces).

Learn about how Sensa works by watching this informative video:


Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Stay awake

Every time I hear of someone who is tired a lot, snores, wakes up often and gets drowsy while driving, I normally ask them if they have asked their doctor about testing them for sleep apnea. Sleep apnea is a breathing obstruction that causes the person to awaken in order to begin breathing again. They will wake up many times during the night to regain breathing.

Sleep apnea could be really dangerous. There was a young man who went to my church that suffered from sleep apnea. His case was so bad that he often dozed off behind the wheel because he was so tired. One day as he was driving home from work he fell asleep while driving around a curve and crashed into a brick mailbox in someone's yard. Thankfully, no one was hurt... well, except the red pick-up truck that he loved so much. That experience prompted him (through the urging of his wife) to seek an answer for his continued tiredness.

His doctor sent him to have a sleep study where they discovered he was waking up hundreds of times during the course of the night. As is normal with most sleep apnea patients, he didn't even know he was awakening that many times.

If you suspect you have sleep apnea, check out for medical resources like locations of sleep centers, information about sleep apnea and other sleep disorders. The site is a directory of all the medical centers and doctors nationwide that treat sleep disorders and cure sleep apnea.

Don't wait any longer if you suspect a sleep disorder like sleep apnea, get help today.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Meet My Friends Monday 5: Introducing Carrie


Meet My Friends Monday is a meme that was started by my friend Toni at It Is Nap Time. It's a great way to highlight or share the blogging friends that we visit. I had originally decided to go down my blog roll and highlight my friends there (it's a good idea Toni had) especially since I don't visit all of them as regularly as I should, but when I met Carrie about a week ago I felt I had to tell you all about her.

Carrie's blog is Little Miss Hannah and it tells of her family's daily life with baby Hannah who is suffering from an undiagnosed illness. When I read their story I immediately fell in love with them. In fact, and I don't say this lightly, Little Hannah and her family have been on my mind almost everyday.

This is an excerpt from what Carrie writes to tell her blog visitors about Hannah:

Hannah was born on July 2008. After birth, she had an enlarged spleen, very low platelets, and an enlarged liver. We are now working with a team of five specialists including a genetics specialist to try and figure out what is going on. Currently, the lead diagnosis is Niemann Pick Type C, which we refuse to accept until it is proven to us. ...

You'll have to visit Carrie's blog to learn more about their life. Each post that she writes is touching and beautiful. You can feel the love, concern and joy leap off the screen. This is a special family with a wonderfully special little girl. I hope you'll stop by and show her some love as well as support her in her search for answers for Little Miss Hannah.

Monday's Muse - Harness ideas, complete projects

There is one thing I've noticed about myself as a writer that I am sure other creative folks have noticed about themselves: Ideas overflow. Although my muse often takes a break during the current project, assignment, post or thingamajig I'm working on, I always have a list of projects or ideas that I could be working on.

For instance:

1. Ask me what my novel is about.
2. Mention inventions and see if I don't have a notebook with several ideas.
3. Did you know I started another blog? (More information later - much later!)
4. I have a completed children's book manuscript with ideas for a series.
5. There's a nonprofit idea on the table (in the folder?).

... And I'm sure there's something I'm forgetting.

So, how do us creative types (or anyone with a multitude of ideas) harness those ideas and get them completed? I don't think I have the answer, do you?

Here's the problem I've run into: Almost any one of my ideas could be a potential moneymaker for me and change my life circumstances, but not one of them makes me money right now! So although I can spend everyday working on my novel, I wouldn't have time to write paid posts. Or, I could throw every extra dime I have into the development and marketing of my inventions, but - oh yea! - I forgot there aren't any extra dimes.

One bright spot is that I've been sending correspondence to potential agents to see if I can get representation for my children's book. If that doesn't work I'll look into marketing it to publishers myself, but for the time being at least I'm being a little proactive.

I guess that's the key: Start small. Well, just start! As long as I continue on the path to at least one of my dreams it's possible that I'll complete a project, right?

Do you have tips and ideas on how to harness ideas and get projects completed? If you do, I would love to hear about them.

Happy Monday!

Connect to reviews

Sometimes when I am driving I look around and check out the different cars that are on the road around me, and I dream about having a new car. Although I am thankful that I have a vehicle to drive, I still think it would be pretty fancy and cool to ride around in a brand new cadillac.

There are only certain makes and models of cars that I know something about so when I thought about owning a Cadillac I knew I would have to do some research. looks like just the site to go to in order to receive accurate and thorough reviews. I was reading about the 2009 Cadillac CTS and I felt like I could trust what the reviewer was saying because as the expert they compare competitive reviews as well as drive the vehicle they're reviewing in order to give an accurate opinion and to find out where each review differs. The online review also lets you know how many expert and user reviews they viewed.

The reviewer rates the vehicle on five key points: styling, performance, comfort and quality, safety and features. Those points are what most consumers are interested in when researching information about a vehicle they are interested in purchasing.

If you're in the market for a new car you will want to consider checking out TheCarConnection; there's a host of information to help you make a decision.

Getting down to business

As parents we often have to come up with creative ways to get our children to do the things we want them to do. For instance, my children will do the chores I tell them to do and possibly stop unsavory behavior, but I often have a hard time getting them to initiate chores and good behavior.

That's why when I spotted a Responsibility Chart in Barnes and Noble during the weekend after Christmas I knew that it was a good idea to try out on my kids. My BFF, who was with me at the time, purchased the chart for me and I introduced it to the kids yesterday.

The chart, which hangs on the wall, has about 22 responsibilities that you can choose from with up to seven you can work on per week. This week my two middle children are working on not whining, sharing, clearing the table, keeping their hands to themselves, no teasing, getting ready for bed and a few others. I chose ones that were specific to what I wanted them to work on as well as some that I knew they were already doing well.

My 5-year-old son is a major whiner and has been hitting and punching his two younger sisters when they aggravate him. My almost 4-year-old daughter teases her brother and whines so those were perfect for her. At the end of each day we review the chart and evaluate how well they did and they each get to choose a smiley face to put next to the responsibility they accomplished that day. If they didn't do as well with it we discuss it, leave it blank and they have a visual reminder of what they need to work on.

Right now their smiley faces are put together, but I hope to get them each their own chart in the future so it'll be easier for them to see how well they're doing. Then as my son grows out of it I can introduce it to my youngest daughter who's 1.

Speaking of the 1 year old, I had to put the chart up a little higher than I would have liked because she still enjoys taking small stuff and putting it in her mouth. I saw her checking out the smiley faces and I knew she had plans to munch on them.

I really hope this chart inspires and encourages my children to keep up their good behavior. I only have about nine months before my teenager goes off to college and I won't have a "back-up person" to help me with them on a regular basis so it's past time to get down to business.
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