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Sunday, July 26, 2009

Seasons of friendship

I was watching an episode of Army Wives on Amber's laptop (Remember the television situation?) and there was a scene where Roland was "informing" three of his friends that they hadn't been there for one of their other friends. The three women made excuses about why they hadn't been around, which caused him to reveal a secret to them to illustrate what they had done wrong.

It wasn't right what the woman had done, but they were wrong for shunning her. That scene brought tears to my eyes because it showed how people will throw away a friendship based on their own beliefs and lack of caring for someone else. What I mean is: I've experienced the lost of "friends" (you know how I feel about that word) and "family" (in laws) because of individuals taking sides or having weird, for lack of a better work, beliefs.

Before I decided not to work things out with my husband, I had a girlfriend who I spoke to on quite a regular basis. Our children played together. We met for lunch and whatnot. And, in general, we were there for each other. At least I thought we were. She started pulling away after my decision and I am under the impression that she didn't want a single woman around her husband. Either that or she couldn't be my friend because of my decision.

To me that means she wasn't a friend at all. That's not really my point though. My point is that although I am hurt by her turning her back on me; I am trying to think that it's possible that her friendship - that relationship - was only for a season. That's what I say to make myself feel a little better.

In case you're wondering, I did continue to call and try to make arrangements to get together but it often doesn't work out. Whereas we were seeing each other several times per month, I may - if I am lucky - see her several times a year. And I can't remember the last time she's initiated contact.

True relationships - sincere friendships - are important. I hope I am a good pal to those I call friend.
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